Feminine body wash is the most ridiculous invention that no woman in any way needs near their vagina. The fact that this product even exists shits me to tears.

What a great way to pussy shame women, tricking us into thinking there’s something wrong with the natural smell of our vaginas.

The Companies Who Created Feminine Wash Are Asshats

I’d seriously like to bitchslap the product development shitgibbon who developed this vile concoction. In doing so, they have helped create a genius way of exploiting and capitalising on women’s insecurities, whilst depleting their pussy confidence.

As if women didn’t have enough to worry about without being told they need a magical ‘wash’ for their dirty, dirty vaginas.

You can even get a whole range of these vile feminine hygiene products; a complete set of ‘freshening sprays’, ‘powders’ and ‘douche’ products to ‘fix’ your lady bits.

What If I Want to Stay ‘Fresh’ down There?

To this I say:

  • As long as you’re washing yourself daily, you’re meeting the personal hygiene standards required to keep your vagina ‘fresh.’
  • Your vagina is not supposed to smell like a tropical fruit, or potpourri.
    It’s a vagina, and it’s meant to smell like a fucking vagina.
  • Moreover, leaving it to smell like its actual smell is super important.
    If it starts to smell differently, you need to know about it so you can get it sorted pronto in case something fishy is going on down there (pun intended).

The vagina is its own perfect self-cleaning eco-system. It is lined with a variety of glands that produce fluids to both lubricate and cleanse the area. Your body also even keeps your yoni at the specific acidic pH range it needs to be to keep it healthy.

Misleadingly, many femwash companies claim their product will:

  • ‘protect you against infections’
  • ‘reduce itching’, and
  • ‘help maintain a healthy pH balance’

Yep, you’ll actually find that horse shit written on the bottle.

As femwash is meant for external use only, I’d love to know how exactly it “protects against infections” and “maintains a healthy pH balance”? Especially as your vag is already doing that for itself.

In regards to the claim that femwash will ‘reduce itching,’ please note that using soaps, perfumes or cleaners of any kind in or around your vagina – even if they’re labelled as ‘pH balanced’ – can mess up the smart little bacteria down there. It can even stop the healthy bacteria from doing their job, and increase your risk of getting thrush, ‘bacterial vaginosis’ or other types of allergies.

(I know firsthand, as there was a time where I accidentally subjected my lady garden to some soapy torment. This led to a very uncomfortable and itchy few days, with a couple of trips to the pharmacy.)

What If My Partner Doesn’t like My Smell?

The fact that this could even be a concern is a result of the bullshit pussy shaming marketing that has been touted (for centuries). The fact that someone could not like the smell of their lover’s pussy indicates something is very wrong with them. Not your pussy.

Every vagina is different, like a fingerprint or a snowflake, and each has it’s own smell.

How anyone could not find their lover’s pussy scent sexy seems absurd to me. Even I find the smell of my own vagina sexy because it makes me think of having sex with my hot wife.

While it’s very much every woman’s choice what she puts into, and around her yoni, please don’t be led into thinking that your pussy need sprays, perfumes or powders to be kept healthy and happy. And certainly not to please your lovers.

Fun fact: A healthy vaginal pH is around  3.5 to 4.5 – approximately the same as a tomato or an apricot.

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